The Lost Realist

For long I tried to tame my mind,
Tried telling myself wrong from right,
Tried telling myself how to feel,
Tried to leave my fears behind.

But there I stood, exhausted,
Tried to hold on to happiness, I failed,
Tried to run from my fears, I failed,
Everything I held onto, devastated.

Then one day I stopped, right there,
Turned back and faced all my fears,
And told them I no longer fear,
Wash over me, kill me, I don’t care.

The pain filled me, my every pore,
But I accepted with humility,
No longer did I try to resist,
Let it rape my heart’s core.

Freedom.

I have no defenses any more,
Pleasure comes, tosses me into bliss,
Pain comes, drowns me deep in sorrow,
I no longer care to find the shore.

I just stand, unflinching like a wall.
Weakness lies in assuming defeat,
Strength lies in fighting for victory,
Wisdom lies in seeing there’s no war.

My heart had only this to show,
Finally I have learned how to let go,
Stopped chasing intellectual worries,
Now I am learning how to flow.

Pain is real. Happiness is real. Fear is not. When you create an intellectual war of running from pain, towards happiness, fear is born. What if we would just follow our heart wherever it takes us, and just accept pain and happiness for what they are, as they are, just be sad when in pain and laugh when we’re happy and not worry about all this unduly? We take life too seriously, we keep forgetting how very short life is.